Starting with Facebook & bl00dy Mindjolt….

*Set the scene*

It’s your day off.

…. yawn…. zzzz…. *blink*

Your better half wakes you at ‘silly o’clock’.

All is partly good in the world, excluding the time. There’s a mug of tea at my bedside. Sorted. Or is it?

The news is on the telly – it’s on timer, set to go on at 6.30 most of the time. What is so bl00dy important that you have to get up at that time? The good bit about waking up is the telly, with @bbcbreakfast I should get the chance to catch up on world news. Not. I am totally deaf in the mornings. Not that I have scientific proof, however, I do get the statement …”You have the bl00dy news on, on the telly and you didn’t hear THAT?” I get irregular links to news, thanks to Craig for his internet stuff, and Ed when I sit next to him at breakfast. I don’t think I really have to explain at this point, when I sit next to Ed, and he has a newspaper in front of him I don’t have to worry for a minute about not keeping up with ‘World Affairs’. I have the occasional moment where I whiffle through an newspaper, attempting not to have a real good rant with our team, over breakfast and a mug of coffee.

Lazy cow.

I do however, have a ‘bit of a rant’ when it comes to football, and those over-paid prima-donnas that prance about on a football pitch advertising the latest football boot, socks or jock straps… Whatever. Whatever floats your boat. I can only imagine the agony last Sunday when Rangers got beaten by Celtic. I couldn’t tell you the score, however, knew that they had won, due to an unending smile on one of our (work) team’s face. To be honest, in my humble opinion, there are some very, very staunch Rangers supporters in our team at work…. Hmmmm. Are there a majority of Ranger’s supporters, or is it because they are so obviously Rangers supporters that I ‘think’ there are more Ranger’s supporters?

Am I going to hold a survey? Nope, I don’t care for football. (no $hit, sherlock)

No offence, does anyone know what I am talking about?

No? Good.

I digressed.

So, the laptop.

Tea’s finished, Ed’s gone off to work. This calls for more tea. Better switch the laptop on, I know I will want to use it. Do I go back to bed? No, I don’t, I sit my lardy ass down on the seat, click on facebook – then ‘plink’ before you know it, it’s 10am and ‘Homes under the Hammer’ comes on. Yes, the telly is on. BBC1 is my favourite for ‘chewing gum’ viewing. You know, ‘chewing gum’ – it’s there in the background, and you can pay attention to it whenever you like. ‘Chewing gum’. I hate it. It’s disgusting and should be banned.

So, in the meantime, I am on my 5th (large) mug of tea, no breakfast and 39 games of word chaos under my belt. See – no pictures and only one link so far… if you are reading to here, I must have got your attention!

For ages, Cube Crash was the favourite. I am still crap at it. For a couple of days, I realised I wasn’t applying logic in the slightest, it was just nice to see the red, purple and green blocks dropping in nice, pretty sequences.

When it got to the stage of seeing the coloured (*note here, it wasn’t black & white) blocks when I closed my eyes, I knew I had a problem. It’s 3pm and it’s time for Relocation, Relocation (Phil’s lovely).

By this time, I have played 560 games on mindjolt. My bladder is wanting to burst. I am feeling guilty, sitting here all day. Thinking about it, the fact that my brain only wanted to watch pretty red, blue and purple boxes fall down must be a wee indication that I need a holiday. I still have to score over 65395. It’s blocks for god’s sakes.

Then I discovered ‘the other game’. That’s worse. There’s a really good thing about it though, at least it teaches you to spell, and occasionally have to google a word that you would have never, ever have thought about in your wildest dreams!

It’s a new game. So, I thought to myself “Craig would love this game. One game. Can’t remember his score. At this point I felt a bit sick, knowing that my short lead of 48 hours was about to get smashed to bits….

By that time, ‘he’ had worked out how to get maximum points, extra seconds, and probably had a programme on his computer, helping – not – some people are just good with words…. . I improved my score from about 2300 up to 6500 (ish). Chuffed.

Then I went out for a walk. Before I went, Mr Wordwhizz was on his second game (iirc) bounding past 30,000 points. How ace did I feel to come home and find 50,570. Arse.

1. Step forward #1: went for a walk. For a full 2.5 hours, I was not playing a mindjolt game.
2. Step forward #2: doing this blog and NOT playing a mindjolt game.
3. mindjolt doesn’t do as it says on the tin. It should be called mindnumb.

It’s now 4.45pm.

Panic sets in. The other half is home in half an hour. No dinner…. no washing done, beds still not made, done the dishes, however, that doesn’t make up for the fact you have done 50% of bugger all on your day off.

It’s easy really, I am the first to admit that I will say “I have done very little all day” , however (gotta put in the ‘however’) I always do ‘something’ relating to housework, I make sure Ed doesn’t realise that I have done very little apart from chill (sort of).

It’s that damn mindnumb… it’s addictive. I am too good at being an expert at doing fcuk all. Sometimes that’s not a bad thing, however, when it becomes a habit, then you have to get your finger out. I have missed on my book reading, after all, I should take a lesson from my screensaver. “It’s now safe to turn off your computer and read a book”. Great idea.

Yup, after seeing red, purple and green blocks when I closed my eyes, just reminded me that I am over due a holiday. That’s coming very soon. 6 days and counting. In the meantime, I have to clear my desk and have to do my ‘duties’ between now and Saturday night. Wish me luck, it could take a while. (finding the desk, that is…)

In the meantime, I have +50k to beat….

However, I am going to sign off and follow the instructions on my laptop.

Off to read a book. Nitey. XX