Groundhog Day

Here we are again. Birmingham, the Spring Fair. It really did feel like Groundhog day today, same hotel, same route, and the same feeling when you walk into the NEC. That ‘oh god’ feeling.

Essential packing: comfy shoes, note book, pen and a sense of humour. You can easily buy a pen & notebook. The sense of humour is much more tricky.

The first thing that caught my eye this morning was the motability scooters. Could I feign a limp and hire one? Do you need a ‘blue badge’ for the honour?! It crossed my mind! However, armed with the essentials and a bottle of water, I headed off to the far reaches of the show. Walk for 20 minutes! Where’s that scooter now?!

The shitty part of today was realising I had started my trawl at the un-interesting part of the show. That was ok, I could live with that. I knew I would have plenty interesting things to follow. Coffee and a chat at 11am was just what I needed. Ed & Lynne had headed off together – the husband / wife combination was a huge NO! Further rules of the game included. ‘don’t speak to me between the review / wine o’clock and going out for dinner’, Ed’s snoozing right now, sorted. Peace.

As much as I saw bog-all today, there were some cracking sayings:

Anything that makes you smile, laugh or giggle, buy it or marry it.”

“Never get so busy making a living that you miss making a life.”

“If at first you don’t succeed, try doing it the way your wife told you.”

I did get asked today, “You look lost, are you ok?!”

At that point, I was able to say, “yes, I know EXACTLY where I am!” that was to change when I needed sat nav. Why complicate things?!?! Zig zag is really fine. Then you get lost. Logic? None!

Another couple of observations: if you are going bald, accept it. The really bad syrup doesn’t do it, it hides bugger all. It only draws the observer to the fact …. YOU ARE BALD. Build a bridge.

Who came up with a name for a company called PMS? Stupid or clever?!

As for farting in Wetherspoons pub in Glasgow airport. Fine. Until you get ‘the look’ from the neighbouring table. Straight away I said, “don’t blame me, blame the sod on the next table pissing himself laughing!” busted.

All in all an interesting day. As for those walking round in 4″ heels. Respect. You won’t bloody find me doing that!

Day one survived.

Wine now! Oh, and a curry! *parp* 😉

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